'The many hundreds who have called me Father'

A Columban friend emailed the letter below to me today. I remember receiving a copy from Father Jim McCaslin himself when he wrote it. He was a priest for nearly 49 years and wrote a number of books including one on the spirituality of the Columbans. But it was his life as a missionary priest rather than these that spoke volumes.

The first time I met him was during the summer of 1969 or 1970 when I was studying in New York. We were driving down the New Jersey Turnpike when something happened that for me was straight out of a Hollywood movie with nuns. We saw three or four Sisters in their habits standing helplessly by the side of the road, looking forlornly at their car with its flat tyre. We did the gracious thing and stopped. The Sisters were Italian with hardly a word of English. If they had seen 'Going My Way' maybe they thought we were 'Fr Bing Crosby' and friend. We changed the tyre, I acting in my usual supervisory role in that situation.

Father Jim was an utterly dedicated and happy missionary priest, with a gentle sense of humour and who could bring you down to earth when you were taking yourself or some issue too seriously.

I have highlighted a couple of phrases in Father Jim's letter

Letter from Father Jim McCaslin (13 March 2003) Father Jim died on 15 September that year

Omaha
Nebraska 68134
USA

DEAR FRIENDS,
I began this on February 3, the feast of Saint Ansgar. Who? Saint Ansgar, a bishop born in France at the beginning of the ninth century. In 826 he began his missionary efforts in Denmark later going to Sweden, and it seems those peoples were not very receptive to his efforts. It is said that "he endured many difculties in his work of evangelization but his spirit never failed". He died in 865. You never heard of him? Well, I wouldn't have either except that he has appeared in my prayer' book (the Divine Office or the Breviary) every February for many years. His feast may be celebrated in Denmark, Sweden and possibly in Hamburg, Germany where he at some stage became bishop — I don't know.

However, his feast in the universal church is not very important and is called `optional'. So why am I writing about him? He was a missionary, that's why, and so am I. This year I opted to read the lesson given for his feast and found it was from The Decree of the Second Vatican Council on the Missionary Activity of the Church (nos 23-24) I was struck in a special way by what was said about missionaries, some of which I want to share with you:"Every disciple of Christ has the obligation to do his part in spreading the faith. Yet Christ the Lord always calls whomever he chooses from the number of his disciples 'to be with him and to be sent by him' to preach to the nations. "Therefore ... Christ inspires the missionary vocation in the hearts of individuals. At the same time heraises up in the church certain groups which take as their special task that duty of preaching the gospel whichweighs upon the whole church. "For there are certain priests, religious and lay people who are prepared to undertake mission work in their own countries or abroad and who are endowed with appropriate natural dispositions, character and talents. These souls are marked with a special vocation, Sent by legitimate authority, they go faithfully and obediently to those who are far from Christ. They are set apart for the work to which they have been called as ministers of the gospel so that 'the offering of the gentiles may become acceptable, being sanctified by the Holy Spirit' (Rom 15:16)."Yet a man must so respond to God's call so that, without consulting flesh and blood, he can devote himself totally to the work of the gospel.

This response, however, can be made only when the Holy Spirit gives him inspiration and strength. For he who is sent enters upon the life of Him who 'emptied himself taking the nature of a slave' (Phil 2:7). Therefore, he must stand by his vocation for a lifetime, and renounce himself and all those whom he consider as his own instead becoming 'all things to all men' (I Cor 9:22).

Forty-eight years ago in 1955 I was sent by the Church through the Columban Fathers as a missionary to the people of the Philippines. Although the vast majority of Filipinos (about 80%) were baptized Catholics, only a small percentage were evangelized in any real sense. I don't know precisely how I was chosen by the Church to be a missionary and as such sent to evangelize Filipinos, but I have always had the firmest conviction that I was, and doing so has been the warp and woof of my life both as a priest and as a man.

Seven years ago I came down with colon cancer in Hong Kong where I had in the previous year gone to continue to help in the evangelization of Filipinos forced by economic necessity to go abroad in search of a livelihood. Cancer is scarey enough that I wondered if my life as missionary among them had been aborted, but after an operation and chemotherapy in Omaha was happy to learn that there was no sign of cancer, and I was free to return to my work of both evangelizing and being evangelized by Filipinos. For that indeed had been happening for a long, long time.Within a year, however, new cancer appeared in the lungs and I began five years of chemotherapy in Hong-Kong, during which time I was able to stay on as a very happy and productive missionary. That was true until July 2002 when I was vacationing in the USA and my lung cancer suddenly began to grow while new cells at the bones at the base of my spine. In that condition I could not return to Hong Kong but had to return to Omaha for radiation and a new chemotherapy. Meanwhile, I reached my 75th birthday while the chemo sapped my strength and Filipinos wondered by phone and letters when I was `coming home'.

My body and my doctor told me that at the very least it would not be very soon, yet I remained optimistic that I would indeed return. After all, I was a missionary who had to stand by my vocation for a lifetime, As a priest and as a man I knew no other life, nor did I want any other. Then about two months ago (in January) my latest chemo was shown to be no longer effective and the cancer was growing again. Since then I have been treated orally with a new one which the literature suggests is resorted to when "everything else fails"! I am not particularly frightened by that news but it does sadden me.

Am I still a missionary when I can no longer be with those with whom my whole life has been spent? Can I be a missionary when I am scarcely able to leave my brother's house, where I have been recuperating and awaiting a return of health that would permit me to be back among them? I can now put more time into prayer and reflection on God's word, but I don't know that I pray any better than before, I have more time to remember with great joy the many hundreds who have called me Father, whose love has sustained me for such a long time. I have always believed that a priest must be a man of prayer if he is to be worth anything at all, a missionary perhaps more than others. The time I had expected to put in face to face I can no longer give. Yet, as their father whose heart they know they own, I must continue give that time even during the long lonely hours of each day, and not forgetting the many others, non-Filipinos, who have also been so much a part of my life, who have loved me more than I deserve and who also call me Father. As poor as my prayer may be,'I have come to realize that for now it's the only way I have of being missionary, And I promise to follow that way as long as I still have breath within me. Perhaps I can apply to myself what I have preached to elderly others, that this time may be the most productive of any other time in a long missionary career. May it be so. Pray for me. Thank you Saint Ansgar, wherever you may be.

Yesterday the doctor told me I should have another C-scan to see whether the present chemo is producing the desired effect, to bring the cancer under control. My blood tests have been good but I am losing weight, and I am also frequently sick to my stomach with lots of vomiting. Not so promising, but God continues to look after meI am sending this especially to the many who have written me but have heard nothing from me for a long 'time. Forgive me. I really have been unable to do what I am doing now because physically it has been too painful. You are worth it but I can't promise to be able to do it again. Depend on my prayers — and my love. Jim McCaslin
(Latest cat scan shows spread in lungs and liver and pancreas. My future seems to be in the past.)

********************************************************************************************************** The Missionary Vocation: Vatican II Decree ‘Ad Gentes' nn. 23-24. (Breviary Office of Readings: Feast of Saint Ansgar — February 3rd)

We must boldly proclaim the mystery of Christ Every disciple of Christ is responsible in his own measure for the spread of the faith, but Christ the Lord is al-ways calling from among his followers those whom he wills, so that they may be with him and be sent by him to preach to the nations. Through the Holy Spirit, who distributes gifts as he wills for the good of all, Christ implants in the hearts of individuals the vocation to be a missionary, and at the same time he raises up in the Church institutes which make their own the task of spreading the Gospel that belongs to the whole Church. A special vocation marks out those priests, religious and lay people who are prepared to undertake the missionary task in their own country or abroad, and have the right natural disposition for it, with suitable gifts and talents. Sent by lawful authority, they go out in obedience and faith to those who are far from Christ. They have been set apart for the task to which they have been called as ministers of the Gospel, to make the Gentiles an acceptable offering, sanctified in the Holy Spirit. Those whom God calls must answer his call in such a way that, without regard for purely human counsel, they may devote themselves wholly to the work of the Gospel. This response cannot be given except with the inspiration and strength of the Holy Spirit. The person who is sent enters into the life and mission of him who emptied himself, taking the nature of a slave. He must be ready therefore to be true to his vocation for life, to deny himself, renouncing all that he had before, and to become all things to all men. In preaching the Gospel to the nations he must boldly proclaim the mystery of Christ, whose ambassador he is, so that in Christ he may have the courage to speak as he ought, and not be ashamed of the scandal of the cross. He must follow in the footsteps of his Master, who was gentle and humble of heart, and reveal to others that his yoke is easy and his burden light. By a life that is truly according to the Gospel, by much endurance, by forbearance, by kindness and sincere love, he must bear witness to his Lord, even, if need be, by the shedding of his blood. He will pray to God for strength and courage, so that he may come to see that for one who experiences great hardship and extreme poverty there can be abundant joy.